Being Considerate to Others can be Inconsiderate to Self!

Being Considerate to Others can be Inconsiderate to Self!

On the weekend I finished my Reiki 1 course.

I was pretty excited because I learnt so much and I am a junky when it comes to learning about spirituality, healing, clairvoyance, metaphysics etc…I have been a student of all of that stuff for more than half my life, but the more I learn the more I realise I don’t know much!!

Which sometimes excites me to the point of getting goosebumps or frustrates the crap out of me!

Anyway, the reason I brought up my Reiki 1 course was that my Reiki teacher was telling us about the whole, “if you don’t like something in someone else it’s a true reflection of what you don’t like in yourself” or, “if you get triggered by a situation or something, the issue is within you”…

I must say that I used to get really pissed off with that stuff because I always thought I was aware of my stuff, and if someone is a dick, why can’t I just acknowledge that they are a dick without having to look at me being a dick?

Why not call a spade a spade?

What my teacher went on to say really made me understand the whole mirror/shadow stuff…she said that yes, some people are just dicks and if we acknowledge and move on quickly without all of the crap that goes with it, then it’s done and dusted. We can call a spade a spade!

OK that makes sense.

But, she went on and said, if you find your reaction to that person being a dick becoming a bit disproportionate to their dickness, that’s when you can ask, hey what’s going on here for me…and  then actually thanking the dick for creating the opportunity for you to clear some of that unwanted gunk up!

Man, how fucking simple was that lesson?

I seriously struggled for years with it all, I never really understood it.

And since understanding that whole mirror/shadow stuff, I have been practising and have realised a lot of stuff about me, and it has been very liberating.

For example, today I was getting really pissed off with my neighbour (who is a friend) for slamming her car door shut really loudly and multiple times throughout the day…it was grating on my nerves and I seriously wanted to go over and rip the car doors off the hinges.

Yes I know. Not a healthy reaction!

So I asked myself, what’s the big picture here? Why this reaction?

I broke it down.

I don’t slam my car door shut…unless I am making a statement i.e.: I’ve cracked the shits, otherwise, I am considerate to my car, to myself, my neighbours, of the noise, etc…

Then I was like, oh, what does being considerate bring up for me, and, BINGO!

I realised that I was reacting because I am an over considerate person at times and, it pisses me off when other people have no idea about consideration. I took it a step further and thought, that sometimes, being considerate to others is actually being inconsiderate to me, and that’s why the over reaction…I have some boundary issues to sort out.

It all made perfect sense.

And now I am aware that I don’t want to be considerate anymore if it is going to be inconsiderate to me. It’s unhealthy, dishonest and it’s not what being considerate is all about.

So there you go, my poor neighbour had nothing to do with the reaction that it brought up in me…well, maybe partially, but, I have sent a spiritual thank you out there to her for slamming her car doors because it taught me a lesson about myself. Oh, and I also sent a telepathic request that she not slam the doors so hard now that I have picked up on that lesson! 😉 xx

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